Thursday, September 23, 2004
On Why George Lucas is Da Man...and Yet I Hate Him
So he hands me the box and I open up the lid and the weasels jump out
And they immediately latch onto my face and start bitin' me all over
(rabid gnawing sounds)
Oh man, they were just going nuts
They were tearin' me apart
You know, I think it was just about that time that a little ditty started goin' through my head"
I believe it went a little something like this . . .
Doh
Get 'em off me
Get 'em off me
Oh
No, get 'em off, get 'em off
Oh, oh God, oh God
Oh, get 'em off me
Oh, oh God
Ah, (more screaming)
--Albuquerque, "Weird Al" Yankovic
Today was fine. Tomorrow we're showing "Donnie Darko" in film society. Yay!
I've been meaning to mention for the past few days that...the original Star Wars trilogy is finally out on DVD! YES! After nearly 30 years, it's out! Woohoo! Now I can see the originals in all their glory...
*parties*
Oh, no, wait a sec. I can't see them in all their glory. Because George Lucas, being the moron that he is, decided to change stuff. Again.
Let's back up to 1997, when the original trilogy was re-relesed into theaters as the Special Edition. What was so special? Well, there were a few added changes, some of which made fans happy, others of which didn't. Let's take a look at what didn't work:
1) In the cantina scene of Episode 4, Greedo shot first. Originally, Han did. Supposedly, Mr. Lucas somehow got it into his head that Han would appear more like a "good guy" if he didn't shoot first. Han's a scoundrel. He kills people when he has to. And we love him for it. That was a really stupid mistake.
How It Was Changed for the DVD: Han and Greedo now shoot at nearly the same time. Still not good enough.
2) In Episode 4, they also added a scene with Han talking to Jabba. Jabba's special effects were really crappy.
How It Was Changed for the DVD: Supposedly the updated effects look much better. Yay.
3) In Episode 5, Luke let out a wimpy scream as he fell down the Cloud City shaft. Not cool.
How It Was Changed for the DVD: No more screaming. Yay. Luke's slightly more masculine now. See, the original way of doing things is better!
4) In Episode 5, the Emperor was played by this really weird old guy.
How It Was Changed for the DVD: They redid the scene with Ian Whatever-His-Name is, the guy who was the Emperor in Episode 6, and Senator Palpatine. However, there's also a scene where he talks to Vader and reveals that *cough*Luke's Anakin's son*cough*. Not cool! You can't just add dialogue to a movie like that! Uuuuggghh.
Of course, a lot of more minor changes were made to the DVDs, those were just a few controversial ones. But the worst change of all, the one that really really really gets on my nerves, and Lucas should be shot dead for changing the originals in this way...
They replaced the ghost of Anakin at the end of Episode 6 with Hayden Christenssen. As in, they've digitally removed an entire actor and put teenage Anakin in. What the heck? It's an entire freakin' actor! Gone! And why oh why would we want to see teenage Anakin again? Aaaggghh. Supposedly it will make sense after Episode 3, but I don't believe it. There's a word for this: stupidity. Of course, our pal George can do whatever he wants with the trilogy - they're his movies, after all. But still, why can't he just release the originals too? For the fans? For the people like me who don't want to see them in all their cinematic glory, as they were originally made? Admittedly, the special effects need some tweaking, but other than that, the originals are fine! Near perfect! You just can't go around changing dialogue and actors like that! Uuuggghhh.
My feelings can basically be summed up in this article. I love George. I hate George. Die George, die.
Hm. I just talked to another friend who saw Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and hated it. I'm telling you, this has to be a cultural thing. Nearly all the Salvadoreans I know absolutely loathe it and think it's one of the worst movies they've ever seen, but all the gringos I've heard talk about it love it. I don't know, maybe my friends were just expecting something lighter and more fun. If that's the case, they were greatly disappointed.
Or maybe it's that the movies about relationships they're used to seeing are really crappy and shallow and follow the same formula. When they find a movie that actually takes relationships seriously and realistically, they don't get it. I may never find out why they hate it.
Ah, I just talked to my friend and I think I know why. He thought it moved slowly and it was boring. *sigh* People these days have no patience. They're used to seeing movies where the action is fast-paced and they don't have to think about what's going on. They should watch more foreign films, where it's the opposite. Things move slowly, but good things come to go those who wait.
Oh well. I'm still considering buying it on DVD, and I still recommend it to the rest of the world. See it. Now.
Also, I finished my Fight Club review. I'll try to post it this weekend.
Quote of Da Moment:
"Hello, Clarice."
--Silence of the Lambs
And they immediately latch onto my face and start bitin' me all over
(rabid gnawing sounds)
Oh man, they were just going nuts
They were tearin' me apart
You know, I think it was just about that time that a little ditty started goin' through my head"
I believe it went a little something like this . . .
Doh
Get 'em off me
Get 'em off me
Oh
No, get 'em off, get 'em off
Oh, oh God, oh God
Oh, get 'em off me
Oh, oh God
Ah, (more screaming)
--Albuquerque, "Weird Al" Yankovic
Today was fine. Tomorrow we're showing "Donnie Darko" in film society. Yay!
I've been meaning to mention for the past few days that...the original Star Wars trilogy is finally out on DVD! YES! After nearly 30 years, it's out! Woohoo! Now I can see the originals in all their glory...
*parties*
Oh, no, wait a sec. I can't see them in all their glory. Because George Lucas, being the moron that he is, decided to change stuff. Again.
Let's back up to 1997, when the original trilogy was re-relesed into theaters as the Special Edition. What was so special? Well, there were a few added changes, some of which made fans happy, others of which didn't. Let's take a look at what didn't work:
1) In the cantina scene of Episode 4, Greedo shot first. Originally, Han did. Supposedly, Mr. Lucas somehow got it into his head that Han would appear more like a "good guy" if he didn't shoot first. Han's a scoundrel. He kills people when he has to. And we love him for it. That was a really stupid mistake.
How It Was Changed for the DVD: Han and Greedo now shoot at nearly the same time. Still not good enough.
2) In Episode 4, they also added a scene with Han talking to Jabba. Jabba's special effects were really crappy.
How It Was Changed for the DVD: Supposedly the updated effects look much better. Yay.
3) In Episode 5, Luke let out a wimpy scream as he fell down the Cloud City shaft. Not cool.
How It Was Changed for the DVD: No more screaming. Yay. Luke's slightly more masculine now. See, the original way of doing things is better!
4) In Episode 5, the Emperor was played by this really weird old guy.
How It Was Changed for the DVD: They redid the scene with Ian Whatever-His-Name is, the guy who was the Emperor in Episode 6, and Senator Palpatine. However, there's also a scene where he talks to Vader and reveals that *cough*Luke's Anakin's son*cough*. Not cool! You can't just add dialogue to a movie like that! Uuuuggghh.
Of course, a lot of more minor changes were made to the DVDs, those were just a few controversial ones. But the worst change of all, the one that really really really gets on my nerves, and Lucas should be shot dead for changing the originals in this way...
They replaced the ghost of Anakin at the end of Episode 6 with Hayden Christenssen. As in, they've digitally removed an entire actor and put teenage Anakin in. What the heck? It's an entire freakin' actor! Gone! And why oh why would we want to see teenage Anakin again? Aaaggghh. Supposedly it will make sense after Episode 3, but I don't believe it. There's a word for this: stupidity. Of course, our pal George can do whatever he wants with the trilogy - they're his movies, after all. But still, why can't he just release the originals too? For the fans? For the people like me who don't want to see them in all their cinematic glory, as they were originally made? Admittedly, the special effects need some tweaking, but other than that, the originals are fine! Near perfect! You just can't go around changing dialogue and actors like that! Uuuggghhh.
My feelings can basically be summed up in this article. I love George. I hate George. Die George, die.
Hm. I just talked to another friend who saw Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and hated it. I'm telling you, this has to be a cultural thing. Nearly all the Salvadoreans I know absolutely loathe it and think it's one of the worst movies they've ever seen, but all the gringos I've heard talk about it love it. I don't know, maybe my friends were just expecting something lighter and more fun. If that's the case, they were greatly disappointed.
Or maybe it's that the movies about relationships they're used to seeing are really crappy and shallow and follow the same formula. When they find a movie that actually takes relationships seriously and realistically, they don't get it. I may never find out why they hate it.
Ah, I just talked to my friend and I think I know why. He thought it moved slowly and it was boring. *sigh* People these days have no patience. They're used to seeing movies where the action is fast-paced and they don't have to think about what's going on. They should watch more foreign films, where it's the opposite. Things move slowly, but good things come to go those who wait.
Oh well. I'm still considering buying it on DVD, and I still recommend it to the rest of the world. See it. Now.
Also, I finished my Fight Club review. I'll try to post it this weekend.
Quote of Da Moment:
"Hello, Clarice."
--Silence of the Lambs
# posted by Andrew Johnson : 9/23/2004 11:06:00 PM 
