Friday, March 30, 2007
Menstrual Pains
I am experiencing the most random mood swings. It's crazy. One moment I'm managing to actually have a good time and enjoy things. The next thing I know, I'm hating life and don't feel like doing anything except sleep and do movie stuff.
If there is a male version of a period, perhaps I have it.
If there is a male version of a period, perhaps I have it.
# posted by Andrew Johnson : 3/30/2007 01:00:00 AM 
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
It's Almost Time...
There are only two more weeks until Full Frame. I am about to wet myself with excitement.
I love being a member of the press. This year I've been kept on the press mailing list, so I've been receiving updates of what's going on with the festival. I've also been able to receive advanced press screeners of some of the films in the mail. I haven't had a chance to watch any yet, but I've got around eight sitting right in front of me. This is awesome. It means I'll be able to watch some of the films before the festival, which will in turn allow me to see other docs during the festival. I think last time I saw fifteen to twenty of the films. I'm definitely going to try and beat that this year.
Also: this is Full Frame's tenth anniversary, so they're doing a lot of cool stuff. To mark the occassion, they have invited ten people that have been really helpful in supporting Full Frame to come back and present one of their favorite documentaries, along with an essay on why it's important. Here's the list of who's coming:
Martin Scorsese
Mira Nair
St. Clair Bourne
Julia Reichert
D.A. Pennebaker
Ariel Dorfman
Walter Mosley
Charles Burnett
Cara Mertes
Michael Moore
I am about to go insane with glee. From what I've read, one event will have all of these people in the same room together. I'm going to die from being star struck. Yes, you read those names correctly. MARTIN SCORSESE WILL BE THERE. I must see if I can somehow arrange an interview. Same goes for Michael Moore, Mira Nair (director of "Monsoon Wedding" and "The Namesake"), Julia Reichert (director of "A Lion in the House" which is probably the best documentary I've ever seen), and Ariel Dorfman (I remember reading "Death and the Maiden" in high school).
Oh, and there will be a documentary about First Amendment defender and famed pornographer Larry Flynt, and Flynt himself is supposed to show up to present it. I don't know a whole lot about him (I guess I should check out that Woody Harrelson movie), but he seems like a very interesting and controversial figure.
Oh Full Frame, you cannot come soon enough!
Quote of Da Moment:
“Now more than ever we need to talk to each other, to listen to each other and understand how we see the world, and cinema is the best medium for doing this.”
--Martin Scorsese
I love being a member of the press. This year I've been kept on the press mailing list, so I've been receiving updates of what's going on with the festival. I've also been able to receive advanced press screeners of some of the films in the mail. I haven't had a chance to watch any yet, but I've got around eight sitting right in front of me. This is awesome. It means I'll be able to watch some of the films before the festival, which will in turn allow me to see other docs during the festival. I think last time I saw fifteen to twenty of the films. I'm definitely going to try and beat that this year.
Also: this is Full Frame's tenth anniversary, so they're doing a lot of cool stuff. To mark the occassion, they have invited ten people that have been really helpful in supporting Full Frame to come back and present one of their favorite documentaries, along with an essay on why it's important. Here's the list of who's coming:
Martin Scorsese
Mira Nair
St. Clair Bourne
Julia Reichert
D.A. Pennebaker
Ariel Dorfman
Walter Mosley
Charles Burnett
Cara Mertes
Michael Moore
I am about to go insane with glee. From what I've read, one event will have all of these people in the same room together. I'm going to die from being star struck. Yes, you read those names correctly. MARTIN SCORSESE WILL BE THERE. I must see if I can somehow arrange an interview. Same goes for Michael Moore, Mira Nair (director of "Monsoon Wedding" and "The Namesake"), Julia Reichert (director of "A Lion in the House" which is probably the best documentary I've ever seen), and Ariel Dorfman (I remember reading "Death and the Maiden" in high school).
Oh, and there will be a documentary about First Amendment defender and famed pornographer Larry Flynt, and Flynt himself is supposed to show up to present it. I don't know a whole lot about him (I guess I should check out that Woody Harrelson movie), but he seems like a very interesting and controversial figure.
Oh Full Frame, you cannot come soon enough!
Quote of Da Moment:
“Now more than ever we need to talk to each other, to listen to each other and understand how we see the world, and cinema is the best medium for doing this.”
--Martin Scorsese
# posted by Andrew Johnson : 3/28/2007 03:13:00 PM
Monday, March 26, 2007
Got Structure?
Apparently, colors provide insight into the deep complexities of my life, and the Internet knows it.
I did that thing Karen posted on her blog. At least 95% of what it told me is true. I am now officially scared. All I did was put some colors in order! And here's what I got:
"You appear to others around you as a person who is simply 'laid back'. From time to time you shelve your ambitions and forgo the desire for prestige and recognition and you are often considered as mentally lazy. You have the ability and you are the first to know this, but you prefer to take things easy and indulge your longing for comfort and security.
You are willing to try anything once. You 'need to be needed' and what is perhaps more important you 'need to need.' You can only feel close to a person or persons when you feel you can trust them, but this trust needs to be proven to you.
You feel that you should be appreciated far more than you are but no-one seems to care! You feel that you are receiving less than your share and the main problem is that there is no-one to whom you can turn to for sympathy and understanding. The inner stress that you are experiencing makes you quick to take offence but you realise that at this particular moment in time there is little that you can do to relieve the situation.
It is said that we are all influenced by our environment and indeed you are no exception. It would seem at this time that even though you may be surrounded by people, you are experiencing an inner loneliness. Fortunately you are sufficiently strong minded to realise that life has a great deal to offer you and that you may miss your share of experiences if you fail to make the best use of every opportunity. You therefore pursue your objectives with a fierce intensity and are prepared to commit yourself deeply and readily. You believe that whatever you would like to do or think 'you can do' - you do! It is because of this attitude that you may be considered by others as arrogant and even conceited, but its fair to say that whatever it is that you really want out of life you will put your heart and soul into it and will not take 'NO' for an answer.
The fear that you may not be able to fulfil or realise all of your ambitions makes you work and play hard. The thought of being prevented from achieving the things you want leads you to play your part with frantic fervour."
I'm not sure if this means technology is extremely advanced or I'm just extremely simple.
I am debating starting my own podcast on Talkshoe. Ponder this further I will.
I am currently working on a short film as part of a group project for one of my Honors seminars. I'm glad I'll be able to at least get a little more hands-on filmmaking experience before the summer. Hopefully the result won't be awful.
Also, I have been accepted into a program to study abroad in China. Woohoo! I am contemplating filming a documentary while I'm there. We will see what happens.
In movie news: I had a conference call with Jon Heder today. He seems like a nice guy. I asked him how his religious background (according to Billy Bob Thornton, he's a nice Mormon boy who doesn't swear) affects how he chooses his roles. He said the sort of thing I'd expect from a religious person in Hollywood: as an actor, he's got to be willing to break down certain barriers, but there are obviously some things he just won't do, and if you know the kind of roles you want, it isn't hard to find them.
The third season finale of Battlestar Galactica was on last night. If my thoughts on this season had to be summed up in one sentence, it would be this:
This season could have been the best yet if the writers had structured it better. As it stands, it's probably the worst.
Season 3 starts off with a bang. The first three to four episodes are fantastic. I think "Exodus Pt. 2" is probably the best episode of the show yet, and arguably even one of the best hours of television ever. It's amazing. However, after those first few episodes, the season really starts to get bumpy, structure-wise. Whereas Season 1 was entirely progressive, and Season 2 had only a few self-contained episodes, this season had a lot of them. I think if I went back and counted them, at least half of the episodes were filler. The show really has started to go the Star Trek route, where there would be weeks and weeks of episodes that really didn't follow the larger story arc. It works with a show like Star Trek, but when a show starts out entirely progressive, it needs to stay mainly progressive. It's okay to have some filler here and there to focus on smaller individual character arcs, but this season just went overboard. It's not that the self-contained episodes are bad, it's just that they don't contribute anything to the overall story, and when you go for four to five weeks without referencing what's happening with the big picture, it can get annoying.
This season had plenty of material in it. There are a lot of good plot and character threads that could have been more fully developed and stretched out over a longer period of time. Unfortunately, due to the poor structure, a lot of these threads don't get the time they deserve or need.
That said, the show is still good. The beginning of the show is fantastic, it picks up again in the middle, and also manages to end on a strong note that leaves me really curious to see what happens in the next season. However, even in the finale, there are some serious editing and structural issues. The main thing, for example, is the last scene. The big cliffhanger, oh-my-God-what-does-this-mean moment. What do they pick for that scene? THE ONE THING WE ALL KNEW WAS GOING TO HAPPEN. Really, nobody is stupid enough not to see it coming. The scene before the very end is much darker and more intriguing. Oof.
Hopefully Season 4 will have some better structure. Unfortunately, it won't air until 2008. Noooooooooooooooooooo! Apparently they're also going to release a 2-hour television movie in late 2007. But until then, what will I do without my Battlestar? Especially since Dexter isn't coming back soon either?
Speaking of poor structure, here's a short little video about how George Lucas screwed up the continuity of his own story with the prequels.
So true. So true.
Oh, and I should probably mention that you can listen to music on my blog now. That's what those little players are on the side. Yay.
Quote of Da Moment:
"Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation."
--Kahlil Gibran
"The person who tries to live alone will not succeed as a human being. His heart withers if it does not answer another heart. His mind shrinks away if he hears only the echoes of his own thoughts and finds no other inspiration."
--Pearl S. Buck
I did that thing Karen posted on her blog. At least 95% of what it told me is true. I am now officially scared. All I did was put some colors in order! And here's what I got:
"You appear to others around you as a person who is simply 'laid back'. From time to time you shelve your ambitions and forgo the desire for prestige and recognition and you are often considered as mentally lazy. You have the ability and you are the first to know this, but you prefer to take things easy and indulge your longing for comfort and security.
You are willing to try anything once. You 'need to be needed' and what is perhaps more important you 'need to need.' You can only feel close to a person or persons when you feel you can trust them, but this trust needs to be proven to you.
You feel that you should be appreciated far more than you are but no-one seems to care! You feel that you are receiving less than your share and the main problem is that there is no-one to whom you can turn to for sympathy and understanding. The inner stress that you are experiencing makes you quick to take offence but you realise that at this particular moment in time there is little that you can do to relieve the situation.
It is said that we are all influenced by our environment and indeed you are no exception. It would seem at this time that even though you may be surrounded by people, you are experiencing an inner loneliness. Fortunately you are sufficiently strong minded to realise that life has a great deal to offer you and that you may miss your share of experiences if you fail to make the best use of every opportunity. You therefore pursue your objectives with a fierce intensity and are prepared to commit yourself deeply and readily. You believe that whatever you would like to do or think 'you can do' - you do! It is because of this attitude that you may be considered by others as arrogant and even conceited, but its fair to say that whatever it is that you really want out of life you will put your heart and soul into it and will not take 'NO' for an answer.
The fear that you may not be able to fulfil or realise all of your ambitions makes you work and play hard. The thought of being prevented from achieving the things you want leads you to play your part with frantic fervour."
I'm not sure if this means technology is extremely advanced or I'm just extremely simple.
I am debating starting my own podcast on Talkshoe. Ponder this further I will.
I am currently working on a short film as part of a group project for one of my Honors seminars. I'm glad I'll be able to at least get a little more hands-on filmmaking experience before the summer. Hopefully the result won't be awful.
Also, I have been accepted into a program to study abroad in China. Woohoo! I am contemplating filming a documentary while I'm there. We will see what happens.
In movie news: I had a conference call with Jon Heder today. He seems like a nice guy. I asked him how his religious background (according to Billy Bob Thornton, he's a nice Mormon boy who doesn't swear) affects how he chooses his roles. He said the sort of thing I'd expect from a religious person in Hollywood: as an actor, he's got to be willing to break down certain barriers, but there are obviously some things he just won't do, and if you know the kind of roles you want, it isn't hard to find them.
The third season finale of Battlestar Galactica was on last night. If my thoughts on this season had to be summed up in one sentence, it would be this:
This season could have been the best yet if the writers had structured it better. As it stands, it's probably the worst.
Season 3 starts off with a bang. The first three to four episodes are fantastic. I think "Exodus Pt. 2" is probably the best episode of the show yet, and arguably even one of the best hours of television ever. It's amazing. However, after those first few episodes, the season really starts to get bumpy, structure-wise. Whereas Season 1 was entirely progressive, and Season 2 had only a few self-contained episodes, this season had a lot of them. I think if I went back and counted them, at least half of the episodes were filler. The show really has started to go the Star Trek route, where there would be weeks and weeks of episodes that really didn't follow the larger story arc. It works with a show like Star Trek, but when a show starts out entirely progressive, it needs to stay mainly progressive. It's okay to have some filler here and there to focus on smaller individual character arcs, but this season just went overboard. It's not that the self-contained episodes are bad, it's just that they don't contribute anything to the overall story, and when you go for four to five weeks without referencing what's happening with the big picture, it can get annoying.
This season had plenty of material in it. There are a lot of good plot and character threads that could have been more fully developed and stretched out over a longer period of time. Unfortunately, due to the poor structure, a lot of these threads don't get the time they deserve or need.
That said, the show is still good. The beginning of the show is fantastic, it picks up again in the middle, and also manages to end on a strong note that leaves me really curious to see what happens in the next season. However, even in the finale, there are some serious editing and structural issues. The main thing, for example, is the last scene. The big cliffhanger, oh-my-God-what-does-this-mean moment. What do they pick for that scene? THE ONE THING WE ALL KNEW WAS GOING TO HAPPEN. Really, nobody is stupid enough not to see it coming. The scene before the very end is much darker and more intriguing. Oof.
Hopefully Season 4 will have some better structure. Unfortunately, it won't air until 2008. Noooooooooooooooooooo! Apparently they're also going to release a 2-hour television movie in late 2007. But until then, what will I do without my Battlestar? Especially since Dexter isn't coming back soon either?
Speaking of poor structure, here's a short little video about how George Lucas screwed up the continuity of his own story with the prequels.
So true. So true.
Oh, and I should probably mention that you can listen to music on my blog now. That's what those little players are on the side. Yay.
Quote of Da Moment:
"Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation."
--Kahlil Gibran
"The person who tries to live alone will not succeed as a human being. His heart withers if it does not answer another heart. His mind shrinks away if he hears only the echoes of his own thoughts and finds no other inspiration."
--Pearl S. Buck
# posted by Andrew Johnson : 3/26/2007 01:00:00 AM
Saturday, March 24, 2007
A Movie Post (with videos!)
Related to various film issues, none of which is significant enough to post on my film blog.
Firstly: my articles were published. Some of the editing is questionable, but oh well.
1) Article about Mark Wahlberg: here.
2) Article about Wes Craven and his son: here.
3) Review of Shooter: Not on the Technician website for some reason. I will post it on my film blog if I get a chance. Basically, although it had some good one-liners and decent action, I didn't like it lot. Very unoriginal.
In other newspaper news - I have been to an early screening of Blades of Glory. I also have a conference call with Napoleon Dynamite himself (Jon Heder) on Monday. Woohoo!
***
I saw Boogie Nights. Holy crap. I think Paul Anderson might possibly be my favorite director. He's certainly in my top five. Wow. This isn't as good as Magnolia (which has replaced Fight Club as my current overall favorite film). However, it's still excellent. Anderson crafts his characters and themes in very subtle, broad ways. This makes them even more powerful and effective at sucking in the viewer, without hitting them over the head with what he's trying to communicate. This is also, I believe, why Magnolia continues to get better on repeated viewings, and why I believe Boogie Nights will end up being the same way. There's a lot of stuff to pick apart and analyze.
This movie has one of the best ensemble casts I've ever seen, and a lot of the people ended up working for Anderson again in Magnolia. For example, here are some of the people in this movie: Mark Wahlberg, William H. Macy, Burt Reynolds, Don Cheadle, Julianne Moore, Philip Seymour Hoffman, and Alfred Molina (whom I almost didn't recognize). There are also a lot of actors who I've seen in a lot of other movies, but whose names escape me. All of the acting is spectacular. I think Marky Mark's performance in this movie is his best yet, and that's taking into account his Oscar-nominated performance for The Departed.
This movie will stay with you long after you watch it. This is the most scathing depiction of the porn industry I have ever seen. This is the kind of film that churches should support instead of boycott, and have in their library. Seriously. I have yet to see anything, film or otherwise, that portrays the hypocrisy, falsity and superficiality of pornography as effectively as this.
***
You see, folks? 300's for kids!
***
I have discovered the short films of a comedy duo known as Barats and Bereta. I present you now with a few of my favorites from them.
"So Smooth"
"Cubicle War"
"The Good Word"
"Completely Uncalled For"
You can view more of their work at their official website. Short films like this are fun. Once I'm finished with my feature-length screenplay, I should write a few.
Firstly: my articles were published. Some of the editing is questionable, but oh well.
1) Article about Mark Wahlberg: here.
2) Article about Wes Craven and his son: here.
3) Review of Shooter: Not on the Technician website for some reason. I will post it on my film blog if I get a chance. Basically, although it had some good one-liners and decent action, I didn't like it lot. Very unoriginal.
In other newspaper news - I have been to an early screening of Blades of Glory. I also have a conference call with Napoleon Dynamite himself (Jon Heder) on Monday. Woohoo!
***
I saw Boogie Nights. Holy crap. I think Paul Anderson might possibly be my favorite director. He's certainly in my top five. Wow. This isn't as good as Magnolia (which has replaced Fight Club as my current overall favorite film). However, it's still excellent. Anderson crafts his characters and themes in very subtle, broad ways. This makes them even more powerful and effective at sucking in the viewer, without hitting them over the head with what he's trying to communicate. This is also, I believe, why Magnolia continues to get better on repeated viewings, and why I believe Boogie Nights will end up being the same way. There's a lot of stuff to pick apart and analyze.
This movie has one of the best ensemble casts I've ever seen, and a lot of the people ended up working for Anderson again in Magnolia. For example, here are some of the people in this movie: Mark Wahlberg, William H. Macy, Burt Reynolds, Don Cheadle, Julianne Moore, Philip Seymour Hoffman, and Alfred Molina (whom I almost didn't recognize). There are also a lot of actors who I've seen in a lot of other movies, but whose names escape me. All of the acting is spectacular. I think Marky Mark's performance in this movie is his best yet, and that's taking into account his Oscar-nominated performance for The Departed.
This movie will stay with you long after you watch it. This is the most scathing depiction of the porn industry I have ever seen. This is the kind of film that churches should support instead of boycott, and have in their library. Seriously. I have yet to see anything, film or otherwise, that portrays the hypocrisy, falsity and superficiality of pornography as effectively as this.
***
You see, folks? 300's for kids!
***
I have discovered the short films of a comedy duo known as Barats and Bereta. I present you now with a few of my favorites from them.
You can view more of their work at their official website. Short films like this are fun. Once I'm finished with my feature-length screenplay, I should write a few.
# posted by Andrew Johnson : 3/24/2007 09:53:00 PM
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Funky Bunches of Oats
I've got three articles printing in the paper this week.
One: interview with Wes Craven and his son, which I took part in.
Two: interview with Mark Wahlberg, which I missed, unfortunately.
Three: review of his new movie, "The Shooter."
I'm disappointed I missed the conference call with Mark Wahlberg. However, I was able to receive a transcript of the call. To celebrate the opening of his new movie, I present you now with everyone's favorite white rapper... Marky Mark.
I can't believe I missed interviewing this guy. Dang it.
Quotes of Da Moment:
"All that running around in my underwear put money in my pockets. I can focus on working in interesting movies without having to worry about supporting myself."
--Mark Wahlberg
"What is your least favorite word?"
"Is 'Marky Mark' one word?"
--Mark Wahlberg to James Lipton, Inside the Actors Studio
One: interview with Wes Craven and his son, which I took part in.
Two: interview with Mark Wahlberg, which I missed, unfortunately.
Three: review of his new movie, "The Shooter."
I'm disappointed I missed the conference call with Mark Wahlberg. However, I was able to receive a transcript of the call. To celebrate the opening of his new movie, I present you now with everyone's favorite white rapper... Marky Mark.
I can't believe I missed interviewing this guy. Dang it.
Quotes of Da Moment:
"All that running around in my underwear put money in my pockets. I can focus on working in interesting movies without having to worry about supporting myself."
--Mark Wahlberg
"What is your least favorite word?"
"Is 'Marky Mark' one word?"
--Mark Wahlberg to James Lipton, Inside the Actors Studio
# posted by Andrew Johnson : 3/21/2007 02:32:00 AM
Friday, March 16, 2007
Way To Go, Man. Way To Go.
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Conversation With God, Pt. 3 (God's Response)
I never thought of this as funny
It speaks another world to me
I wanna be your Easter bunny
I wanna be your Christmas tree
I'll strip the world that you must live in
Of all its godforsaken greed
I'll ply the tar out of your feathers
I'll pluck the thorns out of your feet
You and me
You and me
You and me
And if I choose your sanctuary
I'll want to wash you with my hair
I'll want to drink of sacred fountains
And find the riches hidden there
I'll eat the lotus and peyote
I'll want to hear the caged-bird sing
I'll want the secrets of the temple
I'll want the finger with the ring
You and me
You and me
You and me
And if you make me your religion
I'll give you all you will need
I'll be the drawing of your breath
I'll be the cup if you should bleed
I'll be the sky above the Ganges
I'll be the vast and stormy sea
I'll be the lights that guide you inland
I'll be the visions you will see
Visions you will see
You will see
You will see
You and me
You and me
You and me
You and me
You and me
You and me
("Be Mine", R.E.M.)
It speaks another world to me
I wanna be your Easter bunny
I wanna be your Christmas tree
I'll strip the world that you must live in
Of all its godforsaken greed
I'll ply the tar out of your feathers
I'll pluck the thorns out of your feet
You and me
You and me
You and me
And if I choose your sanctuary
I'll want to wash you with my hair
I'll want to drink of sacred fountains
And find the riches hidden there
I'll eat the lotus and peyote
I'll want to hear the caged-bird sing
I'll want the secrets of the temple
I'll want the finger with the ring
You and me
You and me
You and me
And if you make me your religion
I'll give you all you will need
I'll be the drawing of your breath
I'll be the cup if you should bleed
I'll be the sky above the Ganges
I'll be the vast and stormy sea
I'll be the lights that guide you inland
I'll be the visions you will see
Visions you will see
You will see
You will see
You and me
You and me
You and me
You and me
You and me
You and me
("Be Mine", R.E.M.)
# posted by Andrew Johnson : 3/15/2007 01:29:00 AM
This Speaks For Itself
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Back in Action
I am back at school. Blegh. With the exception of my screenwriting class, I feel like sleeping all day and doing movie stuff. But wait... I always feel like that.
***
Saw Zodiac. Saw 300. Saw Black Snake Moan.
My thoughts on all three of those can be found over at my other blog which nobody visits.
***
Wrote the beginning of my screenplay, got feedback. Though it needs polishing in the revision stage (as expected), the foundation is solid and I'm free to move ahead now at my own pace. Woohoo!
***
For the first time in my life, I now understand why movies are often called a form of escapism. Until now, I never truly needed to escape from life. They work well for that.
Stories make the world go round. They shape the world and help us connect with something outside of ourselves. However, music is what helps us connect with what's inside (which is why it's such an important element of film). I have discovered lately that I am feeling nothing new, and nothing unique. It's all been sung about before. Music combined with lyrics makes for a gateway into the soul. My emotional, mental and spiritual perspective can perhaps be summed up as a combination of the following songs:
"Hey" by The Red Hot Chili Peppers
"The Stranger" by Billy Joel
"A Matter of Trust" by Billy Joel
"Shameless" by Billy Joel
"Driving Sideways" by Aimee Mann
"Wise Up" by Aimee Mann
"Save Me" by Aimee Mann
"We Can Work It Out" by The Beatles
"Extreme Ways" by Moby
"The Blower's Daughter" by Damien Rice
"China Girl" by David Bowie
"Your Heart Is An Empty Room" by Death Cab For Cutie
"True Love" by Elliott Smith
"She's Gone" by Hall and Oates
"No One Loves Me Like You" by Jars of Clay
"I Walk The Line" by Johnny Cash
"Carry On Wayward Son" by Kansas
"Everybody Hurts" by R.E.M.
"Casimir Pulaski Day" by Sufjan Stevens
"Goodbye Stranger" by Supertramp
"One" by Three Dog Night
"Love Rescue Me" by U2
"I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" by U2
"Yahweh" by U2
"Perfect Situation" by Weezer
"O Girlfriend" by Weezer
"Love Reign O'er Me" by The Who
"Rescue Me" by Vintage21
"Praise" by Vintage21
"You Know My Way" by Vintage21
"Look Beyond To You" by Vintage21 (this song makes me weep)
"As I Wait Here Patiently" by Vintage21
I am extremely grateful that I attend a church that acknowledges that the world is a broken place, God cannot be understood, and suffering is not something that should be ignored.
I have begun reading The Ragamuffin Gospel. After reading the Foreword alone, I can already say: Brennan Manning is the man. Say that ten times fast.
Quote of Da Moment:
"Faith is a code to accept that Jesus knows my whole life story, every skeleton in my closet, every moment of sin, shame, dishonesty, degradedness darkening my past. Right now he knows my shallow faith, my feeble prayer life, my inconsistent discipleship, and he comes beside me and he says, I dare you to trust. I dare you to trust that I love you, just as you are and not as you should be, because you're never going to be as you should be."
--Brennan Manning
***
Saw Zodiac. Saw 300. Saw Black Snake Moan.
My thoughts on all three of those can be found over at my other blog which nobody visits.
***
Wrote the beginning of my screenplay, got feedback. Though it needs polishing in the revision stage (as expected), the foundation is solid and I'm free to move ahead now at my own pace. Woohoo!
***
For the first time in my life, I now understand why movies are often called a form of escapism. Until now, I never truly needed to escape from life. They work well for that.
Stories make the world go round. They shape the world and help us connect with something outside of ourselves. However, music is what helps us connect with what's inside (which is why it's such an important element of film). I have discovered lately that I am feeling nothing new, and nothing unique. It's all been sung about before. Music combined with lyrics makes for a gateway into the soul. My emotional, mental and spiritual perspective can perhaps be summed up as a combination of the following songs:
"Hey" by The Red Hot Chili Peppers
"The Stranger" by Billy Joel
"A Matter of Trust" by Billy Joel
"Shameless" by Billy Joel
"Driving Sideways" by Aimee Mann
"Wise Up" by Aimee Mann
"Save Me" by Aimee Mann
"We Can Work It Out" by The Beatles
"Extreme Ways" by Moby
"The Blower's Daughter" by Damien Rice
"China Girl" by David Bowie
"Your Heart Is An Empty Room" by Death Cab For Cutie
"True Love" by Elliott Smith
"She's Gone" by Hall and Oates
"No One Loves Me Like You" by Jars of Clay
"I Walk The Line" by Johnny Cash
"Carry On Wayward Son" by Kansas
"Everybody Hurts" by R.E.M.
"Casimir Pulaski Day" by Sufjan Stevens
"Goodbye Stranger" by Supertramp
"One" by Three Dog Night
"Love Rescue Me" by U2
"I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" by U2
"Yahweh" by U2
"Perfect Situation" by Weezer
"O Girlfriend" by Weezer
"Love Reign O'er Me" by The Who
"Rescue Me" by Vintage21
"Praise" by Vintage21
"You Know My Way" by Vintage21
"Look Beyond To You" by Vintage21 (this song makes me weep)
"As I Wait Here Patiently" by Vintage21
I am extremely grateful that I attend a church that acknowledges that the world is a broken place, God cannot be understood, and suffering is not something that should be ignored.
I have begun reading The Ragamuffin Gospel. After reading the Foreword alone, I can already say: Brennan Manning is the man. Say that ten times fast.
Quote of Da Moment:
"Faith is a code to accept that Jesus knows my whole life story, every skeleton in my closet, every moment of sin, shame, dishonesty, degradedness darkening my past. Right now he knows my shallow faith, my feeble prayer life, my inconsistent discipleship, and he comes beside me and he says, I dare you to trust. I dare you to trust that I love you, just as you are and not as you should be, because you're never going to be as you should be."
--Brennan Manning
# posted by Andrew Johnson : 3/13/2007 11:27:00 PM
Friday, March 09, 2007
Conversation With God, Pt. 2
I screwed up again. Said some things I shouldn't have. How can I best serve You and her by letting this bitterness seep through? Oh, the difficulties that amount when you love someone enough to make them your best friend.
I wish that You would fill me up the way you do her and the others. I wish that You would seep inside my every pore, that I could give every aspect of my life to You, and know it was in good hands. Please God, explode inside me! Let your presence fill me to the brim! Make Your being and Your ways clearer to me than every before!
It's going to be a tough job, though. You'll have to ignore the thoughts and emotions that whirl about during times like this. These long, dark tea times of the soul. You'll have to force Your way in, because part of me is still angry at You. I want You, but not things that You have done and allowed. As Donne wrote, Batter my heart. Last time I prayed that prayer, you took everything away. I only pray it now because I have no other access to You. And I need You. You are my air and sustenance, even when I don't particularly like You. So get in there, God, and prove me wrong. I'm begging you. You seem to have healed her rather quickly (a fact which I'm not sure I'm happy or angry about), so I ask you to do the same to me. How ironic it is that the times I need You most are the times I'm most fed up with You.
Oh Master of the Universe, oh Lord of all Creation, hear the cries of Your servant, no matter how wrong or misguided they may be. As always, I am broken, and in need of mending. I'm feeling a bit like Earl Partridge, overcome with regret. Help me use those regrets to walk more fully in You. I will follow You, Lord, even if at the moment I can't look You in the eye.
I wish that You would fill me up the way you do her and the others. I wish that You would seep inside my every pore, that I could give every aspect of my life to You, and know it was in good hands. Please God, explode inside me! Let your presence fill me to the brim! Make Your being and Your ways clearer to me than every before!
It's going to be a tough job, though. You'll have to ignore the thoughts and emotions that whirl about during times like this. These long, dark tea times of the soul. You'll have to force Your way in, because part of me is still angry at You. I want You, but not things that You have done and allowed. As Donne wrote, Batter my heart. Last time I prayed that prayer, you took everything away. I only pray it now because I have no other access to You. And I need You. You are my air and sustenance, even when I don't particularly like You. So get in there, God, and prove me wrong. I'm begging you. You seem to have healed her rather quickly (a fact which I'm not sure I'm happy or angry about), so I ask you to do the same to me. How ironic it is that the times I need You most are the times I'm most fed up with You.
Oh Master of the Universe, oh Lord of all Creation, hear the cries of Your servant, no matter how wrong or misguided they may be. As always, I am broken, and in need of mending. I'm feeling a bit like Earl Partridge, overcome with regret. Help me use those regrets to walk more fully in You. I will follow You, Lord, even if at the moment I can't look You in the eye.
# posted by Andrew Johnson : 3/09/2007 01:56:00 AM
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
Cool Videos
Evidently mixing genres with zombies is a new fad. I feel so unoriginal now. That doesn't change the fact that this is awesome, though.
Nice "24" spoof.
Nice "24" spoof.
# posted by Andrew Johnson : 3/07/2007 10:35:00 AM
Conversation With God
It's me again. Same as usual. You know me, always questioning. I guess I think too much. Some people say I shouldn't question You or Your will, shouldn't try to understand. But is that not part of my duty as Your servant? To try and understand everything that is You, even if in the end I never will?
I don't understand You. I don't understand, and it kills me. There are things about You that will never make sense, that just don't add up logically. I guess that's part of what makes you You. And I guess I'm not supposed to understand You. It's probably better that I don't. But damn, sometimes I really wish I did. There will always be questions. I think it's entirely possible that I will never be truly content with You, for as long as I'm alive. In You, perhaps, I hope so. With You, who's to say? Is that even a good thing, to be content with You? Or is it not also okay to be discontent, to have to think things through, to not have all the answers. I'd much rather be like C.S. Lewis than someone who didn't acknowledge the questions, the problems, the issues brought up by having someone like You running the show. The centurion may have been more faithful, but Job was more human, and I find I relate more to him. In the same situation, Job would have recognized your healing power, but he also would have asked why his servant was sick in the first place.
And such is the issue I find myself struggling with these days: the problem of pain. The problem of suffering. Or, as I tend to think of it, The Job Syndrome. Until now, I thought I had the answers. I thought that I understood how a loving God and suffering could go hand-in-hand. But there's a reason theologians have been debating it for centuries; there are certain things that happen that just don't make any sense. You made a good world, God, but you sure didn't make it stick to the rules of logic.
Logically speaking, if two people come to you with the same question, with sincere hearts, you give them the same answer. But You don't. The answer You gave her was far different from the one You gave me. Was one of us wrong in our approach? Was I not sincere enough? Or were you lying to one of us, plain and simple?
Logically speaking, if you allow two people to connect in the way we connected, then it is meant for something bigger. If a long-distance relationship survives for two years, it's because there's something there. And if it ends, it's not one-sided. If this was so important, if this, at least for a time, was something that You wanted, how could you not let us both in on what You were thinking? How could You not have the decency to clarify your will to both of us? Are you really so sadistic as to delight in watching us stumble about in confusion and pain?
I cannot accept that. I cannot accept that this is Your will. Some people believe You are a God of history, that You directly cause every event, big and small, that plays out on this little planet of yours. Everything is predestined. By that logic, you caused the Holocaust. You caused September 11. You caused the Crusades, the Inquisition, and every act of genocide that has occurred throughout history. You caused my friend to get lost in addiction. You caused every divorce that has ever occurred. You caused every act of child molestation. Every act of pain has been a direct result of You. If that is true, and those acts of suffering are in Your will, then this one must be as well.
But I can't believe that You would be that cruel. If that is who You are, it would be preferable to spend an eternity apart from You than with You. For You are no different from me. No, in fact, if that is the case, then You are worse than me, and the world would be a better place if I was God.
I can only conclude that this is not Your will. That we have in this case, as happens every day, stepped away from Your will. Your will is the ideal. Your will is what we should aim for, not where we are at. Your will is the salvation of all, the eradication of suffering. Your will is that everyone be happy, and for genocide, death and breakups never to occur. You don't make the world turn, you pick up the pieces when it turns the wrong way. You try to make do with what we've made it, and put together something resembling Your original design. You are flexible.
I don't know what you're going to make out of these pieces. If only You would let me in on it! Then I might know who I am, where I'm from, and where I'm supposed to go. But you won't. And I guess I can live with that. I'd ask You for peace, but I'm not sure if I want it. As Tyler Durden put it,"Let me never be content. Let me never be complete. Let the chips fall where they may."
I don't know where this is going. I don't know what I'm supposed to do. What can I do? In suffering, all I can do is grab onto the One who gave me the ability to suffer. It's a paradox. Lord give me the strength to not let go, even when the answers are a long time coming.
Quotes of Da Moment:
"I have not lost faith in God. I have moments of anger and protest. Sometimes I've been closer to him for that reason."
--Elie Wiesel
"Deep unspeakable suffering may well be called a baptism, a regeneration, the initiation into a new state."
--George Eliot
"Most things break, including hearts. The lessons of life amount not to wisdom, but to scar tissue and callus."
--Wallace Stegner
"God will look to every soul like its first love because He is its first love."
--C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain
I don't understand You. I don't understand, and it kills me. There are things about You that will never make sense, that just don't add up logically. I guess that's part of what makes you You. And I guess I'm not supposed to understand You. It's probably better that I don't. But damn, sometimes I really wish I did. There will always be questions. I think it's entirely possible that I will never be truly content with You, for as long as I'm alive. In You, perhaps, I hope so. With You, who's to say? Is that even a good thing, to be content with You? Or is it not also okay to be discontent, to have to think things through, to not have all the answers. I'd much rather be like C.S. Lewis than someone who didn't acknowledge the questions, the problems, the issues brought up by having someone like You running the show. The centurion may have been more faithful, but Job was more human, and I find I relate more to him. In the same situation, Job would have recognized your healing power, but he also would have asked why his servant was sick in the first place.
And such is the issue I find myself struggling with these days: the problem of pain. The problem of suffering. Or, as I tend to think of it, The Job Syndrome. Until now, I thought I had the answers. I thought that I understood how a loving God and suffering could go hand-in-hand. But there's a reason theologians have been debating it for centuries; there are certain things that happen that just don't make any sense. You made a good world, God, but you sure didn't make it stick to the rules of logic.
Logically speaking, if two people come to you with the same question, with sincere hearts, you give them the same answer. But You don't. The answer You gave her was far different from the one You gave me. Was one of us wrong in our approach? Was I not sincere enough? Or were you lying to one of us, plain and simple?
Logically speaking, if you allow two people to connect in the way we connected, then it is meant for something bigger. If a long-distance relationship survives for two years, it's because there's something there. And if it ends, it's not one-sided. If this was so important, if this, at least for a time, was something that You wanted, how could you not let us both in on what You were thinking? How could You not have the decency to clarify your will to both of us? Are you really so sadistic as to delight in watching us stumble about in confusion and pain?
I cannot accept that. I cannot accept that this is Your will. Some people believe You are a God of history, that You directly cause every event, big and small, that plays out on this little planet of yours. Everything is predestined. By that logic, you caused the Holocaust. You caused September 11. You caused the Crusades, the Inquisition, and every act of genocide that has occurred throughout history. You caused my friend to get lost in addiction. You caused every divorce that has ever occurred. You caused every act of child molestation. Every act of pain has been a direct result of You. If that is true, and those acts of suffering are in Your will, then this one must be as well.
But I can't believe that You would be that cruel. If that is who You are, it would be preferable to spend an eternity apart from You than with You. For You are no different from me. No, in fact, if that is the case, then You are worse than me, and the world would be a better place if I was God.
I can only conclude that this is not Your will. That we have in this case, as happens every day, stepped away from Your will. Your will is the ideal. Your will is what we should aim for, not where we are at. Your will is the salvation of all, the eradication of suffering. Your will is that everyone be happy, and for genocide, death and breakups never to occur. You don't make the world turn, you pick up the pieces when it turns the wrong way. You try to make do with what we've made it, and put together something resembling Your original design. You are flexible.
I don't know what you're going to make out of these pieces. If only You would let me in on it! Then I might know who I am, where I'm from, and where I'm supposed to go. But you won't. And I guess I can live with that. I'd ask You for peace, but I'm not sure if I want it. As Tyler Durden put it,"Let me never be content. Let me never be complete. Let the chips fall where they may."
I don't know where this is going. I don't know what I'm supposed to do. What can I do? In suffering, all I can do is grab onto the One who gave me the ability to suffer. It's a paradox. Lord give me the strength to not let go, even when the answers are a long time coming.
Quotes of Da Moment:
"I have not lost faith in God. I have moments of anger and protest. Sometimes I've been closer to him for that reason."
--Elie Wiesel
"Deep unspeakable suffering may well be called a baptism, a regeneration, the initiation into a new state."
--George Eliot
"Most things break, including hearts. The lessons of life amount not to wisdom, but to scar tissue and callus."
--Wallace Stegner
"God will look to every soul like its first love because He is its first love."
--C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain
# posted by Andrew Johnson : 3/07/2007 01:22:00 AM
Monday, March 05, 2007
At Least It Wasn't As Melodramatic As
"Dry Your Eyes" by The Streets.
However, the guy's thoughts in that song are nearly word-for-word my point of view on the matter. It's interesting how guys seem to think alike. I wonder if it's just a "man thing" to be optimistic about change and relationships.
There were so many possibilities for great things, so much potential for spiritual heights and depths that as yet remain unknown. So much that could have been, yet as the quote goes, it is all "lost, like tears in rain."
Was it worth it? That question doesn't even deserve to be asked. It's like asking whether or not the world is round. Elementary, my dear Watson. Elementary.
However, the guy's thoughts in that song are nearly word-for-word my point of view on the matter. It's interesting how guys seem to think alike. I wonder if it's just a "man thing" to be optimistic about change and relationships.
There were so many possibilities for great things, so much potential for spiritual heights and depths that as yet remain unknown. So much that could have been, yet as the quote goes, it is all "lost, like tears in rain."
Was it worth it? That question doesn't even deserve to be asked. It's like asking whether or not the world is round. Elementary, my dear Watson. Elementary.
# posted by Andrew Johnson : 3/05/2007 02:34:00 AM
Friday, March 02, 2007
Spring Break! Videos! Yay!
Woohoo! Finally, spring break is here. My plans: eat, sleep, work, and watch a lot of movies.
My screenplay pitch went well. After everyone had gone, right as I was leaving, my professor told me he was impressed. He had honestly suspected that I would come in, do my pitch, and everyone would conclude I either needed to pick a different idea or turn my current one into a narrative feature rather than a mockumentary. But the material I came up with on how to work it out has potential of actually working, so I'm free to carry on and start writing. I'm excited.
***
Pure. Brilliance.
***
Last Sunday's service was on Alcohol. That kinda surprised me. Vintage21 doesn't usually get into specific issues like that. But, given the fact that we're going through Proverbs, which mentions alcohol a lot, I guess it was appropriate.
It was an interesting sermon, with a lot of material for discussion. Tyler presented dozens upon dozens of verses which support that idea that drinking is okay. All throughout the Bible, you see evidence that God condones drinking in moderation. It was an opinion that I had already grown to accept as my own, but I did learn a few things, such as:
1) There are two different Hebrew words that refer to wine. One refers to the distilled wine used by merchants (they added water as a means of saving wine and thus making more money), and the other to actual wine. It is possible to get drunk with both.
2) The prohibitionist attitude prevalent in many conservative Christian circles today is a fairly recent development. A great deal of major Christian figures throughout history (eg. Martin Luther, John Calvin) had no problem with alcohol.
Anyways, it was a good talk that served to confirm a few things for me, though I made the switch from prohibitionist to moderationist a while ago. Many probably find this view extremely controversial and disagree. Such is the nature of the issue. Anyways, you can listen to the talk here. It made me think about what I'm going to do when I turn 21. I honestly have no idea. At the moment I simply have no desire to consume alcohol, yet I also don't have any moral issue with it. Can I see myself going through life without drinking? Yes. Can I see myself going through life hanging out with friends every once and a while over a beer? Sure. I could be fine with either of those. But maybe not the beer part... I'm not a big fan of the smell of beer, so I'm hesitant to taste it. Maybe wine. Wine's a good alcoholic beverage. A more civilized one. The kind of thing you have a glass of at special occasions, then leave it and relax. Plus studies show it can be good for your heart, which is an added bonus.
How come wine doesn't get advertised on television? Why aren't there clever little wine commercials during the Super Bowl? Or Don Perignon girls? That's discrimination.
***
A few years ago, two teenagers named Ryan Wieber and Michael "Dorkman" Scott filmed a short lightsaber duel between themselves as part of a choreography contest. The short ended up becoming extremely popular among Star Wars fans, and even managed to land Ryan a brief job at LucasArts working on special effects. That video can be found below:
Now, Wieber and Scott have gone out and filmed a sequel. It's arguably even better than the original. It was filmed on a HD camera, and it looks amazing. The editing, cinematography and FX are all greatly improved. To see the HD version (which I recommend), go here. Otherwise, watch it below.
Those duels are arguably just as good as those found in the movies, if not better. It's amazing what people can do with talent and a camcorder these days. Makes me proud to be a geek.
May the Force be with you!
Quote of Da Moment:
"We're anti-violence. Anyone says different, I'll bust a cap in their ass."
--Fear of a Black Hat
My screenplay pitch went well. After everyone had gone, right as I was leaving, my professor told me he was impressed. He had honestly suspected that I would come in, do my pitch, and everyone would conclude I either needed to pick a different idea or turn my current one into a narrative feature rather than a mockumentary. But the material I came up with on how to work it out has potential of actually working, so I'm free to carry on and start writing. I'm excited.
***
Pure. Brilliance.
***
Last Sunday's service was on Alcohol. That kinda surprised me. Vintage21 doesn't usually get into specific issues like that. But, given the fact that we're going through Proverbs, which mentions alcohol a lot, I guess it was appropriate.
It was an interesting sermon, with a lot of material for discussion. Tyler presented dozens upon dozens of verses which support that idea that drinking is okay. All throughout the Bible, you see evidence that God condones drinking in moderation. It was an opinion that I had already grown to accept as my own, but I did learn a few things, such as:
1) There are two different Hebrew words that refer to wine. One refers to the distilled wine used by merchants (they added water as a means of saving wine and thus making more money), and the other to actual wine. It is possible to get drunk with both.
2) The prohibitionist attitude prevalent in many conservative Christian circles today is a fairly recent development. A great deal of major Christian figures throughout history (eg. Martin Luther, John Calvin) had no problem with alcohol.
Anyways, it was a good talk that served to confirm a few things for me, though I made the switch from prohibitionist to moderationist a while ago. Many probably find this view extremely controversial and disagree. Such is the nature of the issue. Anyways, you can listen to the talk here. It made me think about what I'm going to do when I turn 21. I honestly have no idea. At the moment I simply have no desire to consume alcohol, yet I also don't have any moral issue with it. Can I see myself going through life without drinking? Yes. Can I see myself going through life hanging out with friends every once and a while over a beer? Sure. I could be fine with either of those. But maybe not the beer part... I'm not a big fan of the smell of beer, so I'm hesitant to taste it. Maybe wine. Wine's a good alcoholic beverage. A more civilized one. The kind of thing you have a glass of at special occasions, then leave it and relax. Plus studies show it can be good for your heart, which is an added bonus.
How come wine doesn't get advertised on television? Why aren't there clever little wine commercials during the Super Bowl? Or Don Perignon girls? That's discrimination.
***
A few years ago, two teenagers named Ryan Wieber and Michael "Dorkman" Scott filmed a short lightsaber duel between themselves as part of a choreography contest. The short ended up becoming extremely popular among Star Wars fans, and even managed to land Ryan a brief job at LucasArts working on special effects. That video can be found below:
Now, Wieber and Scott have gone out and filmed a sequel. It's arguably even better than the original. It was filmed on a HD camera, and it looks amazing. The editing, cinematography and FX are all greatly improved. To see the HD version (which I recommend), go here. Otherwise, watch it below.
Those duels are arguably just as good as those found in the movies, if not better. It's amazing what people can do with talent and a camcorder these days. Makes me proud to be a geek.
May the Force be with you!
Quote of Da Moment:
"We're anti-violence. Anyone says different, I'll bust a cap in their ass."
--Fear of a Black Hat
# posted by Andrew Johnson : 3/02/2007 11:28:00 PM
